JANUARY 7, 2009

This is a brief letter written to a dear friend who has just gone through the physical loss of a very close aunt and is also grieving because her Mother, who was so close to her sister, is now having to face this grief without the support of her own daughter.  [Mom lives in one country and Daughter lives in another country!] 

I really feel your pain and concern this morning – and having been blessed to meet your Mother, I have also felt her pain, since I heard of your Aunt’s death!

There is much I would like to say… but most would be better in person.  In the meantime, I can only tell you that part – a major part – of my own journey was not only being asked to separate myself from all denominations, all organizations, but also separating myself from those I loved the most on this planet.

Today I can see clearly that Father was trying to heal me in the emotional realm… so that I could not be swayed by my emotions and make less than good decisions as a result.  Today, now that all of the pain of separation has been healed, I can also see that I would have remained much more vulnerable because of the emotional involvement we Moms all have with our children and husbands.

Today, my caring has not diminished, but my vulnerability has been removed and today I can give full attention to the Father’s voice and NOT TAKE A STEP until I’m sure I’ve heard well from Him.  This is an extremely confidence-building place to be… and what an honor that He loves us so much, He allows us to experience as much pain as needed to help us get in a place where we don’t CAUSE PAIN to OTHERS!

Remember, the 1st Commandment is:  “Thou shalt have no other Gods before me!”  And he’s really serious about that and will, as lovingly as possible, remove all of the self-constructed IDOLS in our lives… even our blood relatives.  On the one hand, there is an aspect that seems unfair… but when you see the BIG picture from His standpoint, you can see that when He takes us through these ‘overcoming’ situations, He feels our pain and knows just how much ‘purging’ it will take before He can lovingly remove us from the potter’s wheel!

I believe this purging I’m referring to today is a perfect example of God’s “refining fire” – our being “birthed [or purified] in the furnace of affliction.  We’re blessed to have a loving Father that cares that much for each of us!

Each of us can extend this process – make it even more lengthy… depending on how firmly we continue to hold onto our own emotional involvements… but Father has unique ways of allowing us to see the need for releasing ourselves and allowing Him to have His way!  After all, He is the only one that really knows what the other person needs.  His ways are so much higher than ours. 

Notice that this separation is not DEATH, as we’ve always thought of it… but it is a temporary separation that is necessary for our own emotional healing… and at just the ‘right time’ Father usually sees to it that the ‘healing of the relationships’ come forth and yet they are not on the level we once experienced.  They are always so much more in balance and so much more of a blessing to each party involved. 

You are loved and I’m so looking forward to spending some time together… when you’re available!







GOD’S DEFINITION of DEATH [Sunny Orly Coffman] 1-7-09          1


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