ONLY ONE QUESTION – WHO AM I
BY: MARY LOU HOULLIS
JULY 29. 2008
There is a realm which far outdistances what we see with our eyes. It is beyond the reflection of the changeful and transit. What we call experience comes and goes and is full of the duality of pleasure and pain. The realm which is beyond duality is where bliss, love, and changeless truth exits. It is referred to in the Bible as the Kingdom of heaven. We are admonished to seek first and foremost the kingdom and told it can only be found within us. For this reason we are encouraged to become seeker of the inner truth of our Being!
As seekers the search then is for our self as the root of consciousness or the mind of Christ, beyond what we call the carnal mind. Our carnal mind is producing thoughts continually, even when we are unaware of them. The awakening begins as we become aware of these thoughts and develop into the observer.
The mind produces thoughts which are like waves on the sea of consciousness. As waves these thoughts come and go continually. In the depth of the sea is the eternal and changeless consciousness of God. We are here to know ourselves as the depth of the sea of Being. As we look at the surface of the sea it seems to change continually, effected by exterior condition. If there is a storm, the sea becomes angry and produces waves, if the temperature becomes very cold, the top of the sea may freeze, and on a still day, the surface seems to be like glass. Whatever is taking place on the exterior seems to influence the sea. As we awaken, we realize it can only be affected on an outside level. Deep within the sea can be found the unchanging truth of its Being. Looking from this changeless depth, we are able to see the external conditions are only affecting the surface and cannot disturb the deep static condition of the sea.
Here is where the Kingdom lies, in the depth of our Being. This is the place where awareness is unshaken, silent, peaceful, alert, and unafraid. We are in what the Bible calls “the world” to loose the mind completely with its various states and conditions and enter into pure consciousness, the awareness of the I Am. I Am is beyond all existence and is the bliss of pure eternal Being. Scripture revealed we have never been separated from this eternal Being-ness accept in our mind. So the cure for forgetfulness of who we are is to ascend above the mind and enter into the I Am.
One helpful way to do this is by continually asking the question “Who Am I.” Then as the answer is revealed we must hang onto the truth without letting it go for even a moment. No matter what exterior conditions try to dictate, we must determine beyond the surface is the unchangeable truth of our I Am-ness.
“Be still and know I AM God.” What a beautiful key has been given us! It is through the stillness of the carnal mind, God is able to transport us to the end of it and into Christ consciousness. As we enter this stillness, freedom from all carnal thoughts will happen suddenly, “in a moment, in the twinkling of an eye!” As seekers we only have one goal, to find our true Being. There is nothing or anyone which can satisfy this goal for us. The treasure we find in our search is this; the seeker and the sought have always been One!
Another key in our search is to continually refuse and reject the incomplete and the imperfect, for the complete and perfect. No matter what changes the surface seems to bring into view, we must become aware in our depth lies the true reality of the unchangeable perfection of God. We have not come from somewhere, and we aren’t going anywhere, we are timeless Being! Our only destination is the realization of the whole, as we awaken and know without a doubt: “You are because God is, and God is because you are.”
Life in this realm is a search for reality and we are here as the seeker! How can we find what we have lost or forgotten? By keeping the paramount question always in our mind, “Who Am I” until we recall the I Am. As we begin to let go of the unreal, the real will emerge. Our consciousness will recognize and penetrate its own Being, realizing itself as timeless. As a timeless Being it will know itself in oneness with the source of both life and consciousness, God.
Seeing Jesus Christ before us discerned the difference between the beginning and the end was only in the mind, we too are awakening to this reality. He came to know himself as the Alpha and Omega, without mother, father or lineage. His oneness with God awakened the realization, his true identity was constant (God the same yesterday, today and forever) beyond darkness and light, life and death, consciousness and unconsciousness and He dwelt in the sense of the I Am.
Many of us are giving our life to this discovery. It burns within our Being and will not let us rest until we find the I Am. Not only are we seeing ourselves as the Tree of Life, but discovering the hidden fruit among the leaves. The only difference between us and others is they cannot yet see.
Sometimes we may feel we are not awakening quickly enough and we desire instant insight. Remember the insight is always preceded by the long preparation. In Jesus Christ’s life we see the same pattern. The encouragement we see through Christ is the fruit on a tree takes time to ripen, but it falls suddenly!
As I dwell on the “I Am” I find the reality of God I have been searching for and my authentic self are the same. As I discover God, I unearth myself and all others without division or separation. I remember what Christ said, “I in them and, thou in me that they be made perfect in one…” This verse now has profound meaning for me. Not only am I discovering my own perfection in oneness with God, but the perfection of all mankind which lies deep within a oneness of Being!
Remembering I AM,
ONLY ONE QUESTION-WHO AM I [Mary Lou Houllis] 7-29-08 1